Harry Potter and the Legend of Link
by Devil Seifer
Summary: Harry finds that he is addicted to a game The legend of Zelda: OOT he played when the Dursleys went on a family trip. Link gets warped through the ceiling of the Great Hall, Second fan fic! Please R&R!
1. Harry's new found love

Harry Potter and the Legend of Link 

Disclaimer: Howdy all. This is my second fan fiction. (First is currently Link of Middle Earth. PLEASE READ!) Anywho, I don't usually do Harry Potter fics but I am very bored and I had this idea for a while now. Anywho! This is a Humor/Adventure/(I guess) Parody! So please enjoy and review! Because if you don't review, you will only cause the apocalypse to happen sooner and it will be entirely your fault!!! Jk! Please enjoy!!! (P.S. I don't own Harry Potter or Zelda)

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Chapter One...Harry's New found love...

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Harry Potter was stretched out on his bed when he heard a large ruckus coming from down stairs. He groaned as he lifted himself off the bed and when to the door.

"Petunia!!! Where's my coat?!"

"In the closet Vernon! Ikle-Diddykins! You're going to need a coat too! It's raining outside! Get an umbrella too Dudders!"

'Awwww…how cute…' thought Harry sarcastically.

"Where are you going?" Harry asked as Uncle Vernon's plum face appeared from behind the closet.

"We're going on a trip while you stay at Ms. Figg's until you leave for your freak school and leave us be!!!" said Uncle Vernon shrewdly as his face turned to a putrid shade of magenta.

Harry remembered when the dementor a few years back had attacked him and Dudley, and when Harry drove it away, Ms. Figg found them and ranted on and on about Dedilus Diggle leaving his post and how one of her cats had warned her about what was happening. Just to give his uncle the satisfaction he was looking for, he acted as if he despised the old woman when in fact he thought she was quite nice, but a bit batty for a squib.

"Why can't I just come along, her house smells like bad cabbage!!!"

"You will stay there, and hope one of her cats won't eat your bloody bird!" Uncle Vernon looked up at his room as he heard a large amount of screeching. "CAN'T YOU SHUT THAT FLUFF OF CHICKEN FEATHERS UP?!!!!!"

"She's not a fluff of chicken feathers and she just got back from getting me a letter from one of my friends!" Harry said irritably.

"Vernon! We need to go!!!" said Petunia hurriedly, "or we'll miss the plane!!!"

"You better not talk one word to Ms. Figg about your…condition!!!" yelled Uncle Vernon as he threw his bag over his shoulder and threw open the door, but paused and added. "She'll be her in an hour! And you better not touch one thing in this house until then!!!"

"Yes, Uncle Vernon." He replied in monotone. Uncle Vernon nodded curtly and stomped out the door. Petunia clip clopped her horse-like face after him, and then Dudley said his good bye via elbowing Harry into the opposite wall and slamming the door.

Harry headed straight to the N64 and found that Dudley only had one game in it, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. He turned it on to see a blonde haired elf looking teenager galloping on a chestnut horse across a plain in front of a castle town. He pressed the start button and found that Dudley seemed to have given up trying to find the sword. Within the first thirty minutes of playing he already got annoyed with a fairy named Navi that followed the main character around. He found a strategy guide and found that his name was Link. Obviously he didn't mind her.

A few hours later…

Harry had used the strategy guide to get all the way to the water temple. He was currently fighting Morpha, he saved the game status knowing he pulled this system out of storage knowing Dudley would never play this game again no matter what. Dudley was currently hooked on the game Halo 2 on X Box. Harry didn't see what was so great about killing aliens in first person shooter. He found it quite confusing to tell the truth. He like Zelda a lot more, there was some very funny parts to it.

Harry realized Ms.Figg hadn't come yet. He saved the game, turned it off, unplugged it, and put it in his room. (Yeah…technically he stole it, or "borrowing without the intent of returning.") Just as he got everything set and ready to go to Ms.Figg's house, he heard the bell ring throughout the house.

"Coming!" Yelled Harry pulling his trunk to the door, he looked through the eyehole, and it was Ms. Figg huffing severely. Harry opened the door to be greeted by his old neighbor. "Are you all right?" he asked.

"I'm fine dear!" she puffed. "Are you ready?"

"Yes." He said, but added as he remembered the N64, "I've got to get something first! Do you have a TV?"

"Yes," she answered question in her tone. "Why?"

"Be right back!" Harry said as he ran up stairs.

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Well, I might as well remind you that I will write Link and Harry's parts separate until Link goes into the wizarding world. It will get funnier when Link is introduced in the next chappie!!! So tell me how maybe I could throw Link into the home land of Harry Potter! Please review as I told you before! Must I repeat my warning of the apocalypse?! Damn!!!! REVIEW NOW OR RISK DEATH!!!! Jk!

Thankx!

D.Seifer


	2. Link to the worst day ever

Harry Potter and the Legend of Link

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Disclaimer: Howdy!!! Hope you liked the first chappie!!! This next chapter is Link's part and soon you will see the insanity of when a Hyalian crash lands into the wizarding world. I do not own Harry Potter or Zelda. Cry thanks Kikyo's Killer for the review!

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Chapter Two: Link to the worst day ever…

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Hyrule Castle Town…

Link ventured through the crowded town seeing a girl chasing a chicken, two lovers who twirled around so much it made him dizzy watching them, and a new sword, shield, and artifact shop next to the Bazaar shop. He saw the most awesome artifact sword in the window. He stepped into the shop and heard a ding of a bell above him. The clerk bustled out to the counter and greeted the hero.

"Good day young sir!!!" he exclaimed bowing so low that when he came back up he hit his head under the counter. "Wow that hurt! Is there anything you want me to show you from our case or window or from"

"Could I please see the sword in the window?" Link asked, pointing at the artifact sword.

"Why yes sir!" said the clerk excitedly bustling to the window to take down the sword. The old clerk put the sword on the counter. "This is a sword that has been tested to date back to the creation of Hyrule! It is said that this sword could be the sword of one of the goddesses. If you look at the ornate rubies, emeralds, and sapphires decorating the hilt, there are ancient symbols engraved on the blade that must explain how to properly use it to its extent."

"May I pick it up?" asked Link. The clerk nodded fervently. Link looked at the sword carefully, "how much is it?"

"500 rupees." The clerk said dismayed.

"500 rupees!!!" yelled Link dropping the sword but quickly picked it back up and set it on the counter. "That's my whole wallet!!!"

"You have a wallet that big?" asked the clerk, his eyes the size of a 5-rupee piece.

"Well, I guess I'll get it." Said Link emptying his wallet. "I think I will be able to read the writing. That's why I'm getting it."

"Sir! If you do, could you please come back and tell me?!" pleaded the clerk, "I've been trying for years, and decided to sell it in case someone else can!"

"Sure old man!" said Link reassuringly, "when I talk to Princess Zelda and we figure it out, I'll tell ya!!!" the clerk realized that Link's way of talking completely changed. The clerk shrugged and wrapped up the sword and the sheath and handed it to Link. When Link took hold of the hilt the clerk noticed the Triforce symbol upon his left hand.

"You're the Hero of Time! Aren't you?" he asked suddenly. Link jumped taken severely aback.

"Erm…yes…why?" he asked getting back on his feet.

"I'm very pleased to be in your presence!!!!" the clerk bowed several times this time and banged his head on the top of the counter this time instead of the bottom and was knocked out. Link set the 500 rupees for the sword in the change drawer for the clerk, and silently walked out. Just as Link tip toed out of the shop someone went to walk in, Link stopped him and said, "the clerk isn't able to sell anything at this time, he banged his head on the counter one too many times."

Later at Hyrule Castle in Zelda's room…

"Link! You found the sword of the goddesses!!!" exclaimed Zelda her eyes shining in the torch light of her room. "You know what this means?!"

"Ummm…we're filthy rich?" he asked randomly.

"No! Link this sword is probably able to give you some amazing power or something!" she said excitedly. She laid the sword carefully on her nightstand and held her hands over it and whispered ancient Hyalian spells over the sword. Link noticed the sword didn't react to them.

"Erm…Zelda…it's not working." He noted.

"I KNOW! I just need to find the right spell." She snapped.

SEVEN HOURS LATER…….

"May I look at it?" asked Link. Frustrated with the sword, Zelda rolled her eyes thinking '_what can LINK know about getting the sword to react_,' and handed it over. Link felt the sword's blade become from cold steel to somehow…warm…He looked at the writing and closed his eyes and concentrated on the writing in his mind's eye. Then all of a sudden felt the words flow through his mind like he knew how to speak the language all his life. Then, he spoke…_"Nu yanyo ku janda ne yako buden gertendo demo majuko ye luedo meyen."_

"Link! What did you say?!" asked Zelda taken aback by Link's all of a sudden knowledge of the sword's language. "How did you know that?!"

"_He who is chosen by the sword will learn of the magic of a new world."_ Chanted Link, his eye's seemed to stare off into the abyss of the sacred realm. The sword gleamed with a holy light, and in front of Zelda's eyes, Link shined in the haze and disappeared.

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WHAHAHAHAHA!!!! CLIFF HANGER BONUS!!!!! Right now it's kinda serious but just wait! It'll get better!!! So please R&R I don't mind flames!!!! Just don't do it on purpose because I said I don't mind!

Thankx!

D.Seifer


	3. Bumpy Ride

Harry Potter and the Legend of Link

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Disclaimer: Konechiwa what's up all? Chi??? What the hell are you doing here! This isn't a Chobits fic, go now!!! ::Kick:: CHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry about that… As I said, until the worlds collide, I will be bouncing in between the lives of Link and Harry. In this chapter I will be writing of the trip until the great hall where the dooms of all mankind will meet. (I'm gonna sing the doom song now! Doom doom do doom doom dooom doom do doom do do dooooooommmmm…doom doom doom do doomy doomy doomy doom doom doom doom DOOOOOOOMMMM! ::Had to shorten it. You can only type the word doom so many times:: The End!) I don't own HP or LOZ! (:

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Unsuspected twist...

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Harry entered the familiar house of Ms. Figg. He set his things in the extra bedroom and headed for the TV. (He realized why Dudley love video games so much…they're so ADDICTING!!!!) He patted Hedwig on her feathery head and sat down to turn on the game. The familiar beginning flashed on the screen and he saw that he was all the way in the beginning of the temple!!!

"What the" said Harry, "That sucks!" but after wandering a bit around the tower in the Water Temple he saw the longshot pad to the boss room. He entered the room and saw a huge water pillar with a big nucleus in the center rise up in front of Link. Later on after he beat the crap out of Morpha, he went to Kakriko village to find it aflame. As the cinematic scene went on, Ms.Figg came in the room with a stale piece of chocolate cake.

"No, thank you," said Harry quickly, "I'm not hungry."

"But you're just skin and bone!" she protested. "Please eat something!" Harry's stomache chose the worst time to grumble and decided to accept the offering of cake. "We're going to Diagon Alley tomorrow to find your school things. Did you already get your letter from the school?"

"Yes."

"May I have it, so I can plan out the days route?" she asked with her hand out to accept the letter.

"erm…sure." He got up and gave the letter to the elderly woman and sat down to play some more.

The Next Day…

The streets of Diagon Alley were cluttered with many chattering witches and wizards. Harry was just coming out of Florish and Blotts when a resounding "HARRRRYYY!!!" floated over the crowd. Harry turned around to see a mass of redheads pushing toward him. Ron Weasley reached him first!

"'Ello Harry! You're a bit early mate for shopping!" Ron said mockingly.

"Then why are you here?" said Harry pushing the question back to his best friend.

"Catching pixies…" said Ron quickly. "Naw, we're shoppin' too. Oh yeah! Hermione's here too! She's back there. Who are you with???"

"Ms.Figg." said Harry noticing she was having some trouble getting back to him through the crowd.

"Harry!" Yelled Hermione, as the rest of Ron's family followed her. When she reached his she gave him a big hug and jumped back as Mrs.Weasley came to greet him.

"Oh, Harry dear! It's so good to see you again!" said Mrs. Weasley, as she tried to smooth down Harry's uncontrollable locks.

"Harry!" said Ron mockingly as Harry tried to get out of Mrs.Weasley's grip. "When was the last time you brushed your hair?!"

"Oh, shut it Ron!" yelled Harry as he finally got out of the preening grip of Mrs.Weasley. "Ms.Figg, can Harry stay with us until school?"

"Ron!" yelled Mrs.Weasley, slapping him upside the head.

"Sorry mum…" mumbled Ron as he rubbed the back of his head where he got severely slapped. Harry and Hermione laughed loudly at Ron's dispense. "SHUT IT YOU TWO!" Ron yelled, causing Harry and Hermione to laugh harder.

Later on in Diagon Alley…

Harry, Ron, and Hermione wandered the streets catching up on each other's lives. Harry walked by an alley and heard someone yell a spell.

"IMPEDIMENTA!!!"

A steam of light slammed into Harry's side, launching him into a table out side an ice cream shop.

"Harry!" screamed Ron and Hermione. Harry pulled out his wand and got up to face his opponent.

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?!" Harry yelled at the stranger in the shadows, his side screamed with pain from the impact of the spell. He noticed that his scar started to burst into an explosion of pain. The stranger lunged for Harry. Ron and Hermione yelled in unison, "STUPIFY!!!" The spells fused and slammed into the black robed man. Harry recognized the yell that was uttered from him…it was Wormtail…

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Sorry but I gotta cut it short…just think of the suspense!!!!! Sorry I lied! Please review!!!!

D.Seifer


	4. Bumpy Ride Part 2

Harry Potter and the Legend of Link

Disclaimer: Hey Y'all! How you been!!! Well here's the second half of "Bumpy Ride." I had to cut the other part short because I was going down to Tucson for a night so I wanted to get that up and I hope you all enjoy this next chapter!

Thankses!!!

D.Seifer!

P.S. I don't own HP or LOZ!

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Bumpy Ride Part 2

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Wormtail jumped at Harry, who dodged it and (something he learned from Zelda) rolled away and got to his feet, his wand poised.

"EXPELLIARMUS!!!" Wormtail flew into the opposite wall. Harry walked forward to reveal him to the crowd when suddenly Wormtail backed away and said, "You won't be getting this time, Potter!" and with a loud crack, Wormtail disapparated. Harry sighed deeply and stuck his wand into the back of his jeans but remembered what Moody had said about wands and back pockets of jeans and quickly put it in his front.

"Harry! Harry, are you all right?!" wailed Hermione checking where the spell hit him in the side.

"I'm fine. Just a bit shaken." Harry replied. "Hermione, where's Ron?"

"Probably somewhere whizzing himself." Said Hermione dryly, but on queue, Ron appeared with some people from the Ministry of Magic.

"Good job, Ron." Said Hermione as Ron approached. "I thought you were off whizzing yourself."

"Ha ha ha…very funny." Said Ron sarcastically, "Harry! Are you all right?" asked Ron checking where the spell hit him.

"I'm fine. Just shaken." repeated Harry irritably.

"Harry!!!" Harry, Ron, and Hermione whirled around to see Mrs.Weasley running toward them crying heavily. "Harry, I was so worried!!!! Are you all right?!" Mrs.Weasley grabbed Harry and checked for vital signs.

"MRS.WEASLEY!" shouted Harry irritably, "I'M FINE!!! CAN I PLEASE BREATHE NOW?!!!" Mrs.Weasley let go of Harry sheepishly and checked where he'd been hit by the spell.

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Seven days later…

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Harry, Ron, and Hermione had packed up all of their belongings for the train to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Hermione approached Harry outside of the Burrow.

"Harry."

"Hey Hermione, what's up?" said Harry as he saw the brown-haired girl.

"Who was that guy that attacked you at Diagon Alley seven days ago?" asked Hermione.

"It was Wormtail."

"But his hand! It was-" said Hermione quickly, but Harry interrupted.

"He cut off his hand to bring back Voldemort." Said Harry slowly. "Voldemort rewarded his sacrifice with replacing it with a molten silver hand."

"Well how do you prove that he was the betrayer of your parents?" asked Hermione desperately.

"Well I-"

"Harry! Hermione! Come on! We're going to be late!!!" yelled Ron, throwing the twittering Pigwidgeon into the back seat of the MofM car. Harry motioned to Hermione that he would tell of everything later.

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On the Train to Hogwarts…

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Harry explained everything that happened during his fourth year at Hogwarts and just after he finished, Malfoy just happened to hear everything Harry said and started to tease him until Harry stunned the crap out of him with a number of spells.

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In the Great Hall…

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Dumbledore made his usual pre-feast speech announced that sadly, there would be no Defense of the Dark Arts class this year because everyone's too friggin' chicken to take any spot for a job. (Snape applied, but there where no takers for the Potions class, so Dumbledore had no choice but to decline Snape's change in position. Much to Snape's bitter dismay GRRRRR ) Harry, Ron, and Hermione started to eat the great feast. Harry looked up at the ceiling…it was quite clear and starry…but something was falling from the sky it seemed, he heard an ear splitting yell as someone crashed through the ceiling, landed on the Slytherin table (right next to Malfoy), Onto the Gryffindor table, (right next to Neville who screamed and pushed himself out of his chair), onto the Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, then finally onto the high table right in front of Snape and rolled off onto the floor with a large groan.

"Navi…where on Hyrule are we?" the young boy asked. He had blonde hair, a green tunic and a large green hat to match, sapphire eyes, and long pointy ears. Harry thought that he had to be at least a few years older that he was. A ball of blue light flew out from inside the hat.

"I have no clue, Link, " she said. "By the way! Are you alright?" she asked looking down at her severely hurting master named Link.

"How did we get here?!" asked Link.

"I think it was that Sword of the Goddesses." Link looked at the blade wondering.

"Excuse me," Dumbledore had approached the young man.

"GAAAAAAHHHH!!!!" Yelled Link pulling out the Goddess Sword and held it in his frightened arm.

"It's alright, my name is Albus Dumbledore. I am the Headmaster of Hogwarts." Dumbledore calmly spoke to the scared man.

"What kind of name is Albus Dumbledore? Where am I? What planet am I on? And why are you so…erm…well…wrinkly?" Navi slapped him hard on the head while Link replied with a resounding "OWIE!!!"

"Actually my name is-" Dumbledore began but was cut short by an equally wrinkly woman. "Erm…you are in the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry-"

"Did you train Agniem because he gave me HELL one time because he wanted to rule the world?!"

"Who's Agniem?"

"Erm…never mind." Muttered Link, "what planet am I on?"

"Earth."

"Eee-aaarrth???" everyone laughed because of Link's hard time of trying to pronounce the planet's name. "What kind of freaked out name is that?"

"The name of our planet." Said the wrinkly old lady.

"Did you know that you're just as wrinkly as that guy over there." Link said pointing to Dumbledore. She got up out of her seat and walked up to Link…waited…took out her wand and punched him in the face with the other hand; then silently walked back to her seat mumbling curses under her breathe.

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A/N: Hey all! Thankx for the reviews and I'm happy that you're enjoying my stories

Link is having a very hard time with McGonagall…and extremely hard time!!! Bye now!

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Kikyo's Killer: I did a rush update just for you, okay? Now just don't turn your name to D.S.'s Killer okay?! Thankses!!!! I'm happy you like my story!

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	5. Point of no Return!

Disclaimer: Howdy…sorry it took so long to update. cry My computer was being stupid for about a month! cry well…don't own HP or LOZ, so on with the show!

Point of no Return!!!

"What do you mean that you don't know how to get back?!!!!" yelled Link at Dumbledore.

"You're going to have to search for information in our lib-" Dumbledore said smoothly but was quickly interrupted.

"I don't wanna look through you're stinkin' library!!!!" yelled Link causing Navi to hide in his hat.

"How about this…" Dumbledore began.

"WHAT?!!!" growled Link.

"Please let me finish," said Dumbledore trying to calm the raging Hyalian. "We need a Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher and you seem free enough to be able to do it while you search for a way back home. You will have free room and board with your own office to decorate in your own personal way. We have the most extensive library in any school in the country, so please feel free to do all the research you need."

"Errrr…well…what do you think we should do Navi?" Asked Link indecisively.

"I say we take his offer." She said peeping out of the brim of his overlarge hat. "It would be a good idea to maybe do some research on the sword of the goddesses if they have it."

Link heaved a sigh. "Alright…I'll take your offer."

"Thank you very much, Professor…Errrr…" Said Dumbledore happily holding out his hand.

"Ummm…Kokiri…Professor Kokiri." Shrugged Link taking the headmaster's hand. Everyone started to whisper excitedly about the sudden signing of the DADA teacher. The girls of all the tables started to talk of how hot he was while all the boys started to wonder what the Sword of the Goddesses was.

Sorry this is such a short chapter. I just need to get this up and running. Please do not filet me alive…okay…thanks!

D.Seifer


	6. Grease Lightning

Disclaimer: HOLY CRAP!!! I JUST GOT A BUTT LOAD OF REVIEWS FROM ONE CHAPTER!!! THAT IS SO RIGHTIOUSLY KICK A$$!!!!!! ::Sighs from disbelief:: …wow…I'm just on cloud nine!!! Thank you so much for the reviews! I was going to check my e-mail and check movie times for _Electra_ but I put all that aside just because of all the reviews. Sorry once again it was so short. ::Bows many times and accidentally hits head on floor:: owwww…anyways…Thanks a lot for the reviews and this is just for you!!! ::Blows kisses and cries out that people love her:: (Yeah…I'm a girl…this name it to throw people off...like Zelda getting a sex change)

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P.S. Don't own HP or LOZ…sorry.

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"Home Sweet Home"

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Link stumped into his new room and set his hat, swords, shield, and the rest of his inventory he somehow carried around with him on the desk before he flung himself on the feather pillowed mattress. He closed his eyes thinking about how crappy his life has become… sent to this hell hole by a sword that he just bought off of a stupid merchant and now has to teach little magic using brats how to defend themselves from who knows what…man…could it get any worse?

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Dumbledore's office…

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"Albus! What are you going to do? He will eventually find a way home!"

"I know Minerva…I know…" said Professor Dumbledore as he paced his study hurriedly, stroking his beard as his half moon shaped glasses flashed in the firelight. "I never had to do such a cruel trick to anyone before but for this year, we truly need a Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher in the light of the Dark Lord's return."

"But he's an innocent boy! He may have said I was incredibly wrinkly, but he's just a kid!" exclaimed Professor McGonagall, "No older that the students."

"Minerva…He must stay…"

"Why do you drag him in when he doesn't know the danger he is in by coming here and taking this job so he can just go home?!" She asked exasperatedly, almost to tears.

"He must stay here…I know it's wrong but he may be able to teach some skills no other would be able to teach the students for self-defense of a different kind! Plus I told him of everything that has to do with this job and he agreed. So no more questions!" Professor Dumbledore said hurriedly before McGonagall could speak again and walked into his office. She stood there staring where the headmaster was standing for what seemed an age, before walking back to her own office for the night.

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Gryffindor Tower…

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"Harry! You know this guy?!" asked Ron incredulously when Harry explained he was from a Muggles imagination only to find that Hermione (shockingly) knew him too.

"I don't know how he found out but" Harry began only to be interrupted by Ginny and Luna.

"Harry…isn't the new DADA teacher just the hottest guy ever?!" Ginny asked, her eyes slowly glazing over.

"I don't really want to answer that Ginny…I tend to be straight." Said Harry to the daydreaming red-haired girl, as she seemed not to notice his reply.

"I heard he was in a video game!" said Luna.

"Where did you ever hear that?" asked Ron sarcastically.

"My dad." Luna said simply.

"Ooooooohhhhh…Right…your dad." He replied. Thinking that for once Luna's dad got something right. Hermione looked at her watch and saw that it was 12:00.

"We talked way too long." She said to the others, "We need to got to bed." Ron gave a heaving yawn in reply and walked up the boy's staircase. Harry said goodnight and followed watching Hermione, Ginny, and Luna go up the girl's talking fervently of Professor Kokiri's handsome good looks.

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Next day…

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Link woke up to a raving fairy head-butting his forehead screaming to get up and get to the great hall. Link swatted at the annoying fly and hid under the covers. Navi wasn't about to give up. She went quietly to his ear and whispered:

"Link…Mido's proposing to Zelda." Link jumped out of bed and somehow already with his sword in had screaming for Mido to go to hell and many other unsavory things unfit for

"About time you woke up." She said, glaring at her green clad friend.

"Where is he?! I'll give him something to propose to!" he said angrily, "My fist!!!!" Link punched the air approximately where Mido's head would be.

"Link. That was just a way to get your lazy ass out of bed." Navi said angrily as she watched Link stare at her now feeling stupid. "Forget it. Just get dressed in those robes Dumbledore dropped off and get to the Great Hall." Navi flew out of the room.

"Hmph. She could have done something a little less disturbing." He grumbled, and later shuddered at the prospect of Zelda marrying Mido.

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Great Hall…

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Link walked into the double doors to find a huge feast. He stared as everyone stared back to see him wearing wizarding robes with the Master and Goddess Swords strapped to his back with his Hylian shield strapped over those. He wore a green shirt with some shabby jeans that Dumbledore gave him so he wouldn't walk in the Great Hall no wearing any pants. A unison sigh echoed from the girls of every house as Link walked slowly to his seat at the teacher's table. He eyed the teacher in the seat next to his. This one had extremely greasy hair and a particularly large nose. Link cringed at the fact that he probably never washed his hair in his life. He walked to Dumbledore and whispered in his ear.

"Do I have to sit next to Grease Lightning?" Link asked quietly, the teacher stared at him, somehow knowing that Link was talking about him. Dumbledore nodded and whispered that his name was Severus Snape. Link gave the teacher another glance, it was just too gross to imagine going near that head of head oil. He gathered all the courage he could muster and sat next to the grease ball.

"Hi." Said Link trying to break the awkward silence.

"Might I ask what you said to the headmaster about your seat?" Snape asked coldly, his dark eyes boring into Link's sapphire ones. Link started to pay extreme attention to the food in front of him. Snape's eyes started to flash dangerously.

"If I am correct, that it was something about my hair and my nose." He said acidly glaring terribly at the Hyalian.

"Goddesses! Why would I say something like that?!" asked Link quickly.

"You don't have to hide it," he said his cold eyes quickly getting angered by the minute. "I know you have an issue with me, what it is, I wouldn't know. Except I don't like it when twerps like you won't admit it."

"I'm not a twerp." Said Link indignantly, quickly starting to eat the food nearest to him. Snape sneered at him and started to eat as well. Link finished eating, took some bread with him for Navi and left only to be stopped by Dumbledore.

"Where are you going?"

"To your library." Replied Link. "I want to figure a way to get home." Dumbledore glanced at McGonagall to see her raise her gray eyebrows back at him in that this was bound to happen.

"…Very well." He said slowly. "But make sure that you get your classes planed for today."

"Erm…Wha?"

"See the three in the Gryffindor table?" Dumbledore asked.

"No."

"The ones with the black, brown, and red hair?"

"OH! Yeah."

"Go ask them to help you get a class schedule together."

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D.S.: Hehehe…Dumbledore seems to be having evil plots to keep Link at Hogwarts for a year. Does he know how to getLinkbackhomebut not telling him? Will Snape get a nose job??? Will Link ever stop wearing a dress??? Sorry. Got off track

Link: IT'S A FRIGGIN' TUNIC!!! TU-NIC!!!!! GET IT RIGHT!!!! GRAARRGGHH!!!

D.S.: You're my slave. I will call it what I wish. So shut up and be a good slave. ::Link glares as D.S. take out fresh cookies from the oven and starts to eat them in front of him:: Thanks for reading! Please review!!!!!


	7. Link's Grand attempt to Teach! Part One

Disclaimer:

D.S.: Hey y'all! Waz up! This is yet another installment of Harry Potter and the Legend of Link! I'm so sorry that it took me so long to update on this stupid fic. Eh! Who cares? What's kinda scary is that some people actually like this! Eh…I love this song…I've got 1000 words from FFX-2 on my computer from long ago. (Starts singing terribly along with Yuna and Lynn)

Harry: D.S…. You need to stop that right now. (Ron and Hermione nod in unison) You're scaring everyone. (D.S. shrugs, puts on Yuna cosplay outfit, and starts singing again)

D.S.: -SUSPENDED ON SILVER WIIIIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGGSSSSS!

Harry, Ron, Hermione, and rest of HP cast: MY EEEEAAAAARRRRRRSSSSSSS! GAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

D.S.: Eh…okay…on with the show! (Starts to hum to herself as she continues to listen to the song)

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Harry Potter and the Legend of Link

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Chapter 7: Link's Grand Attempt to Teach! A Change in the Curriculum! Part one!

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Link walked up to Harry, Ron, and Hermione and nervously asked if they could follow him outside if they were done with their breakfast. (He hadn't eaten himself because he was afraid of the names that he discovered the day before; i.e. Shepard's pie. But he was floored at how "heartless" these humans were when it came to eating animals. In Kokiri Forest, he only ate fruits and berries! Animals were his friends! They even ate them for breakfast in little sausages!) Link briefly prayed to himself that the animals had a good reason to die and be cooked savagely by these round-eared people. Harry, Ron, and Hermione nodded, grabbed their bags, and followed Link out of the Great Hall.

"What's the matter, er, Professor?" asked Harry.

"Erm…Eh heh heh heh…this is weird." Mumbled Link.

"Do you not know how to do magic?" asked Hermione who was blushing furiously at Link's blonde, shy, cuteness.

"Eh…you could put it that way. I probably could learn as I go but I've got classes today and I don't have any plans for the kids!" Link sighed deeply thinking he was doomed to be laughed at by kids he didn't even know! Hermione saw what Link was going through, and got an idea.

"How about we help you plan out your classes!" said Hermione as it hit her. Harry, Ron, and Link stared at her as she started to get excited over making class plans for Link.

"Is there enough time?" Asked Harry.

"We?" asked Ron.

"Really? Could you do that?" asked Link.

"Yes, yes, yes, and yes." Said Hermione. "I have one question. Link, how are your study skills?"

"Erm…" said Link, putting his finger to his lips in thought as a memory came to him of when Zelda tried to give him some education…

* * *

"LINK! GET BACK HERE!" Screamed Zelda, as she chased Link down the hallway. Link jumped onto the rail of the staircase slid down to the first floor of the castle.

"I hate this stuff!" yelled Link as Zelda ran down the stairs to catch the Hero of Time. "It makes my head hurt!"

"You learned over 57 mathematical formulas in less than three minutes!" Zelda screeched as she flew off the stairs and landed in the hero's arms…there was an awkward silence. "How long are you going to hold me like this. The blood is rushing to my head." Link swiftly let her go, but she lost her balance and fell to the floor. Zelda got up, clutching the back of her head.

"Link! Hylians are capable of learning things right when they look at them! How do you think you learned all those songs just by listening to them only once?"

"Massive amounts of luck?"

"NO! You got a goddess given gift that is given to everyone of our blood and if you want to harness that then you will be able to come up with good strategies to use against your opponent! (She's coming up with one right now if you hadn't noticed yet)

"But my head hurts!" Zelda started to hiss, as she puffed up in anger. She growled loudly, grabbled Link's ear, and dragged him back to the tutoring room.

Three minutes later

Link glared as Zelda opened a book and smiled. "Alright! Time for your magic lessons!"

Link groaned as Zelda flipped through the chapters. "This one should be easy! Din's Meteor!" Link lost interest right after the word 'Din's'.

"I already know that one." He said sleepily.

"You know Din's Meteor already?" asked Zelda incredulously, _it took me forever _(three minutes in real-time)_ to learn that one!_

"Din's-what?" asked Link; waking from his daze.

"ARE YOU LISTENING!" yelled Zelda as she realized that Link was only half listening and thought she said 'Din's Fire'.

* * *

"See." Link said after he told the flashback. "I'm just worried that I wouldn't be able to do it all without getting a headache!" Harry, Ron, and Hermione stared at Link in disbelief as Link sweatdropped and smiled appologetically.

"Don't worry. Let's get started!" said Hermione, punching her fist into her other hand. "first up, is the first years!" Link, Harry, and Ron sighed as Hermione went into a long explination of hinkypunks. (can't spell)

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Sorry that this took me about erm…(insert random number) amount of months to finish…I got a bad case of writers block, (gasp!)so I had to start another fic to take a break from the ones I already have…I'M NOT WORTHY! You know the song that I was talking about in the beginning of the chappie; before I finished the fic I actually got an ipod mini so I got to put all my MP3s on it and it's so cool! I know some people who don't like Apple…I don't like them much, but the ipod was the only MP3 player that had 6GB that I could afford sooooooo now I can torture my fan fiction slaves with my wondrous singing, only…WITHOUT the music! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Characters of HP: LOL: NOOOOOOOOO! WHY US?

D.S.: OH, A THOUSAND WORDS! CALLED OUT THRU THE AGES! WILL FLY TO YOU! AND- (Harry pulls the earphones out of the ipod and tares them apart)

Characters of HP: LOL: Yay!

D.S.: WHY THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT! YOU LITTLE FREAK, NOW I'M GOING TO PAIR YOU WITH PANSY PARKINSON!

Harry: Nooooooooo! I'll be good! I swear! Please! Not her! (Starts to imagine Pansy in lingerie)

D.S.: Well…while Harry fantasizes, I will just say, thanks for reading, and please review! (Continues Harry's punishment while the rest of the characters grimaced, winced, and ooh-ed)


	8. I Use a Hammer!

Disclaimer:

Hey guys! It's been ages since I've written on this fic and I'm so sorry! I've been on a constant writer's block and I can never think of what to do next! . Grrr…this is way too hard, I'll try to devote myself to writing one chapter per story a week…or maybe two if I can muster the strength and motivation of a brownie…of course I'm on a diet so I can't have a stinking brownie AND I'LL NEVER GET MOTIVATED! (Cry) Oh well, ON WITH THE SHOW!

P.S.: I've decided to have Epona in the fic, even if it doesn't seem right, I just want her in it. So if you don't like it, then don't read it…but please review…nicely…

P.P.S.: Part two of the previous chapter will be written after this one. When Harry, Ron, and Hermione go to his class.

P.P.P.S.: I like brownies…

P.P.P.P.S.: I like cake too…

P.P.P.P.P.S.: Llamas are my favorite animals…

P.P.P.P.P.P.S.: I'm going to stop now…

P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S.: bye…

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Chapter 8: I Use a Hammer!

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Harry, Ron, and Hermione finished up teaching Link his lesson plans for the entire year and ran to their Care of Magical Creatures class. Harry noticed that once again, they were with the Slytherins; Malfoy's hair stuck out of the crowd like a sore thumb, Harry's mind wandered to Link, he just couldn't believe that a "fictional" game character was real and the fact that there is actually a world out there that housed people that are known to the Muggles of Earth as entirely fictional! Harry's mind returned to Earth just in time to notice an ordinary-looking chestnut horse, rearing and neighing up a storm as Hagrid tried to coax her from the edge of the forest; the horse started to calm down when she started to stare fixatedly at Hagrid's pocket; Hagrid, who didn't notice for some time, had a huge carrot stuck in his pocket, which was causing the horse to stalk hungrily toward the half-giant.

"What th' heck are ya lookin' at!" Hagrid was backing away as the horse neighed and gnashed her teeth hungrily at Hagrid's pocket. Harry realized something, that horse was Epona, Link's horse…_but how did SHE get here…Link came through the ceiling! Not by horse!_ Harry ran up and tugged at Hagrid's coat.

"Hagrid, I think she wants your carrot." But before Hagrid could even move the carrot was snatched right out of the coat by a large set of horse teeth. Epona ate the carrot happily and galloped off toward the castle.

Ron gawked at Harry. "How did you know that she wanted the carrot!" Hermione nodded.

"Remember when I told you about Link?" Ron nodded. "He has a horse named Epona, and I think that's her."

"Wait a second! Link came through the ceiling of the Great Hall; not by a horse!" Hermione nodded in agreement.

"I wonder how she got here." They stood there pensive for a few seconds when they heard the distant creak of the castle doors; the trio turned around to see the horse's hindquarters disappear behind the large wooden doors.

"NO!" Harry, Ron, and Hermione started towards the castle but were gathered by two, very large hands.

"'Member tha' you three 're still in me class."

"BUT THE HORSE JUST WENT INTO THE STINKING CASTLE!" Ron roared loudly in front of the entire class of Gryffindors and Slytherins.

"Really?"

"YES!"

"Let's go git 'er!"

Ten minutes later… 

"Hinkypunks are well know to be very calm creatures and…" Link looked up from the textbook and stared out into the hall beyond the door. "Do you guys hear that?" Link asked the class of first year Ravenclaws.

"Yeah, it sounds like horse hooves!" Link leaped off of the stairs in his class and ran out into the hall to see Epona galloping towards him being followed by a crowd of students.

"What are you doing here!" Link greeted his horsy friend. "How did you get here?" two balls of light with wings appeared out of Epona's mane.

"Zelda sent us!" Tatl beamed; Link could only stare, a long time ago he had searched for Navi in Termina, only to get his horse stolen, turned into a Deku scrub, have to save the world again, and meet the two fairies that hovered above him…ISN'T THE WORLD JUST A WONDERFUL PLACE!

"Wait! Did she find a way between worlds?" Link asked quickly. It was Tael's turn to answer.

"Yeah," Link's face brightened like a new sun, " but the way she found only happens every three years." Link bowed his head in disappointment. Tatl went to comfort her Hylian friend.

"Professor!" Link looked up to see Harry, Ron, Hermione, Hagrid and the rest of the class sprinting toward him and the rest of the crowd.

"Yes?" Link replied staring as Harry, Ron, and Hermione stopped in front of him huffing and puffing heavily, trying to catch their breath.

"Is-that-your-horse?" huffed Harry as he sat on the ground due to dizziness caused by running too much. Link laughed nervously, scratching his head.

"Hehehheh…yeah, I'm sorry I'll take her somewhere that she can take a dump without getting in trouble." He started to lead Epona outside only to be stopped by Hagrid.

"I take car' of plenty o' creatures," He chuckled. "One mor' won' hurt!"

Link stared, "thank you very much!" Hagrid pulled another carrot out of his pocket and coaxed Epona to follow him out of the castle. Harry looked at Tatl and Tael.

"Who are they?"

"Oh! These are some friends of mine; this is Tatl," Link pointed to the yellow ball of light, "and this is Tael." Link pointed to the black ball of light. Right then, a piercing bell split the scene.

"WHAT DO YOU WANT!" Link roared at the source of the ringing, which happened to be Tatl.

"I'm bored." Link fell over in shock, as did everyone else; Link stood back up and dusted himself off, he turned to Tael.

"How do YOU get other people's attention, I was just wondering for later on." Tael smirked.

"I use a hammer." The eyes of every person grew to the size of dinner plates as they saw the poor professor being slammed in the head with a large hammer wielded by a black fairy.

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Ahhhh…I'm truly sorry that it took me so long to update. I've been restricted from the computer and finally am back on! YAYNESS! I'm terribly sorry, and if you want to send letter bombs, send them to my friend David and he will take care of them. Thank you very much! 


	9. Learn Some Physics! very short

Disclaimer: HOW DIDDY HO KIDDIES! I know that you all have been anticipating the next (hopefully longer) exciting and funny chapter of Harry Potter: The Legend of Link…but I'm just gonna ramble on aimlessly about how I can't do the chapter because I have writer's block!

Fans: FOR THE LOVE OF LLAMAS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

D.S.: Just kidding. I love you all so much, I have overcome my mental disorder and have fully reached nirvana so I could die right now and I could go play poker with Jesus and Moses! (Once again…just kidding)

Jesus and Moses: ..U …erm…. (For the final time I'm just kidding)

D.S.: I just want to say that due to many changing events that have happened in the new Harry Potter book that conflict to the happenings of this story I have decided to keep everything just as it was, and just won't be able to say anything that will give away all that is in the actual HP book in case that someone who hasn't read it yet won't be angry that I spoiled something for them…I will say that I did cry at the end of the 6th book and I also was listening to a really sad song while reading so it added to the feel of the book…DON'T EAT LLAMAS! IT'LL DO YOU SOME GOOD AND MAKE YOU FEEL ALL WARM AND FUZZY INSIDE! I guess this means that I must get on with the show…

(POOF!)

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Chapter 9: Learn Some Physics! (this is very short…Gomen!)

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Link later retreated to his office, beaten, bloody, and severely ticked while being followed by the three fairies that were just going on about random fairy business that Link could care less about. He asked Dumbledore if there was possibly at least one stinking book that wasn't checked out that could help him get home. Dumbledore sighed and shook his head while on the inside his conscience was screaming, "YES! THEY'RE ALL IN MY STINKING OFFICE!" Dumbledore walked away before he actually blurted out what he was thinking; Link sighed in despair.

"I don't know what the heck I'm going to do about getting back home…"

"Maybe you could use Forore's Wind!" Tatl piped up happily.

"Tried it."

"Wizard magic?"

"Trying."

"Use a map?"

"WE'RE ON ANOTHER PLANET…at least I think so…" Link mumbled. Tael jumped up and down (in the air) excitedly.

"How about making a BIG slingshot, aim it in the direction of Hyrule and have everyone here shoot you back?"

"I'd burn up in the atmosphere…learn some physics."

Navi smiled, "Then I guess you just might as well work on acing that citizenship exam because you're gonna be here for a very LONG time." Link glared at the blue fairy.

"YOU'RE NOT HELPING!" Tatl turned around to see Harry approaching the group.

"Professor…" Link looked down from his main point of focus; Harry pulled out a copy of the Daily Prophet.

"Oh! Yes?"

"I was wondering, do you know about a wizard named Voldemort?" Link looked confused at the odd question being prodded from him.

"Erm…I'm sorry, but I don't."

"Do you know a…Ganondorf?" Link's eyes widened in horror, _how does he know about Ganondorf?_

"…Yes…Why!"

"This." Harry handed the newspaper to the Hylian and waited patiently as the pointy-eared professor read in horror the story that was being unfolded to his mind. _Voldemort is rumored to be working alongside a terrible ally, his name, age, origin, etc is unknown; there has been an attack in central Wales where many Muggles and wizards have been injured and murdered. The Death Eaters appeared at 3:04 in the afternoon and started to attack the residents of the area. Accompanying the Death Eaters was an enormous man that could use magic without a wand and is extremely dangerous…_

Link stopped reading; he couldn't bring himself to keep going. Ganondorf was doing one of two things: just having fun killing, or was looking for him. Link's knees started to give, Link staggered to the wall and slid down to the tile floor, feeling helpless and alone. _What am I going to do?_ _This is just too much for me! _Link sighed in despair. Harry sat down next to the hero.

"You can beat him." Link looked up at the young wizard and just couldn't believe what he was saying.

"I've been fighting this guy all my life…I just can't take it anymore, it's too much...I just want it to end." It was Harry's turn to sigh.

"How many times have you beaten the living daylights out of him?"

"I lost count at 7."

Harry laughed, "Then you can do it again! What kind of hero lets the bad guy win just because he's tired!" Link smiled.

"You're right." Link started to laugh. "I guess I'm just suffering from lack of brain cells, must be from getting smacked in the head one to many times from that damned hammer."

Harry looked at the Hylian professor, "The one thing is that you also need to wait in the dark until you see that he may know where you are, then figure a way to throw him off…then let him HAVE IT!" Link realized that Harry was giving him some really good advice without sounding like he was telling him what to do and how to do it. _This kid is really something!_ The castle bell rang for the end of class and the beginning of lunch.

Harry and Link got up and cleaned themselves off as the students poured out from the classrooms toward the Great Hall. Link and Harry looked at each other, smiled, and headed for lunch.

* * *

The next day…

* * *

"LINK, GET YOUR LAZY ASS UP!" Navi, Tatl, and Tael have been trying to wake Link up for an entire hour.

"Hee hee hee…hellooooooo Zelda!"

"WAKE UP YOU STINKING PERVERT!" screamed Tael, pulling out the Fairy Hammer of Doom and smiting Link with it. (Who'da thought that Link was a pervert!)

"WAGH! HEY! THAT HURT, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!"

"To get you perverted, lazy, ass up!"

"Why are you calling me a pervert?" The fairies looked back at him and stared as they realized that maybe it was the way he was talking because he was asleep that made him sound sick-minded. Link wouldn't dream about Zelda like THAT and be happy about it…Zelda hurts him too much. "Sorry Link."

"Ah it's okay…I'll get my revenge later." The fairies looked at each other wondering what Link's revenge would be.

* * *

D.S.: (starts getting pelted by thousands of hate plushies by the fans for the chapter being so short) I'M SO SORRY! I WAS KICKED OFF THE COMPUTER AND NOW I HAVE TO WRITE IN SECRET WHEN MY PARENTS AREN'T HOME! Ooooh! A Garra plushie! I WILL ALLOW YOU TO SMITE ME WITH ALL THE PLUSHIES YOU LIKE, I may keep a few, but that doesn't matter!

Harry: You like the caps lock button too much, you know that right?

D.S.: I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT!

Ron: My bloody ears are going to die if you keep on using that damned thing!

D.S.: WHAT!

Ron: (sigh) never mind…

D.S: OKAY! (For all who have seen Chapelle's Show…don't know if I spelled that right….)


End file.
